Goats

How do I take care of my pet goat?

Goats probably make the best pets of any animal because they basically take care of themselves. One of the best things about goats is they barely need any room to move around, so if you have a basement or a spare bedroom or the trunk of a small car, you’re perfectly equipped to properly care for a goat.

Most people are aware that goats will eat anything, which is sweet because that means you can pretty much go ahead and cancel that garbage pick-up service. Anything you would ordinarily put in a garbage can is perfect goat food. All you have to do is dump that garbage can on the floor where the goat is penned up and by the next morning it’s gone. And the floor is polished.

A lot of time folks will ask me what to do with goat waste. They’ll say, “Hey, Silky, you were totally right, goats are awesome pets, but what do I do about all the turds and the smell?” Sorry, friend, but you don’t own a goat. Goats don’t shit. Sometimes if you feed it sugar and chocolate chips it will excrete a stream of cookie dough through its rectum. As for the smell, goats naturally give off a fresh pine scent.

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